The kids are grown, they are marrying, going to college, joining the military, and having children. It’s especially fulfilling to watch my daughter schedule the grandbabies. Understanding the importance of nap times, bedtimes, and meals makes her daily grind less stressful. Watching my daughter makes me reminisce about my early years as a mother. Thinking back, I would have to say success in scheduling was determined by my consistency.

Being a young twenty-something year-old with five kids in seven years, I was beyond tired, and being consistent went against my natural habits. It wasn’t something I learned as a kid, so I struggled as an adult. But, as with most things in life, with a little growing up and maturing, I began to realize my efforts in being consistent would pay off so much more than the work it took to be consistent. And that’s the key.

Whether you’re still a young mother or you’re nearly an empty nester, consistency is the key to success in scheduling and life. It begins with making a goal of accomplishing your schedule for one day. The next morning, it’s time to make that goal and commitment again. It’s not like a New Year’s resolution that is quickly forgotten within a few weeks. It’s a day-by-day, focused dedication to form a habit in yourself and in your children.

At the beginning, it’s not easy. It takes a lot of self talk, because this area of life is fully your responsibility. You won’t have your mother or mother-in-law calling to tell you what to do. (If you do, that’s another topic called boundaries!) The success of your daily routine is fully in your hands.

It reminds me of making a lifestyle change. I recently started the Whole30 eating plan and, just like creating a routine, it was HARD. It took a great deal of focus and determination to get through the first week. It went against every natural inclination in my body. But, by hanging on, getting through day-by-day, I successfully finished the thirty days, and it changed my lifestyle of eating. Success!

So, you’ve written your schedule, tested it out, evaluated, and made adjustments. Now comes the hard part: being consistent each and every day. Will you be perfect? No; don’t expect to be. You will have really good, successful days, and you’ll also experience setbacks and failures. But the key to consistency is starting again the next day. Regardless of what you feel or what the previous day held, it’s essential to stay focused on your commitment for this new day.

Obstacles

No matter how well prepared we are or how consistent we try to be, there are always things that crop up, standing as obstacles to our success or as interruptions to our rhythm. Because of the uniqueness of your family and your situation, your obstacles and interruptions will naturally be different from mine. But, there are also many similarities that allow similar methods for overcoming.

Personal Obstacles

Often, our own personal habits tend to be our biggest obstacles. Here are a few examples:

• Social media
• Losing track of time with a book or project
• Lack of consistent wake up and bedtimes

Here are a few suggestions for helping establish discipline:

• Use timers for activities that you tend to lose track of time on. Be disciplined to stop when the timer goes off.
• Communicate with your spouse about a good morning and evening routine to establish a consistent rhythm.
• Give yourself permission to do things that are fun, like social media, reading, and projects; just be sure to set boundaries around those these so they stay fun instead of becoming consuming and draining.

The Exceptions

As important as it is to protect our routines and schedules through boundaries, sometimes we need to be willing to throw those routines out the window and just get back on track tomorrow. It might mean skipping a chore, grabbing fast food instead of cooking, or dropping a school assignment. In the long run, though, there are some things that are more important. Here are some examples:

• Unexpected hubby time
• Opportunity to visit a long-distance friend
• Burnt lunch or other bad day experiences
• Unexpected weather (first day of spring weather, unexpected snow, power outages, storms, etc.)
• Emotional needs of children (times of rejoicing or need for comfort)
• Disobedience

The exceptions vary so widely, often crop up at the most inopportune time, and can be incredibly difficult to handle wisely. And, if these exceptions start to become the norm, it is important to address the reason behind those exceptions and try to regain control. Otherwise, though, these are times when the routine simply needs to be ignored.

Here are some suggestions for handling these times:

• Let something slide. Yes, it really is okay. Even for those of us who are type-A personalities! So, the sheets might not get changed this week or that school assignment might have to be dropped. You might even have to order pizza delivery instead of cooking. It really is okay!
• Focus on the relationship. Your marriage needs it. Your friendship needs it. And your children definitely need it!
• Handle emotional needs and obedience issues immediately. It is not possible to hold to a routine or schedule if these things are allowed to slide. Take time to celebrate or cry together, and definitely take time to discipline. It will pay off more than a strict adherence to the schedule ever will.
• Take a moment to enjoy the moment. If you’re trying to get supper on the table, but your 6-year-old comes in exclaiming over the sunset, take five minutes and go watch it together before it’s gone. On that first sunny day after a week of rain, you’ll be much more likely to be productive if you go spend an hour soaking up the sun.
• Turn failures into fun. Did you burn lunch? Did that unexpected friend visit leave you late on starting dinner? Have frozen pizzas or some other pre-packaged meal on hand. Let it be something you might not otherwise cook to make it a special treat. And, if you go the whole month without needing it, plan game night and enjoy the treat then.